Top 5 Wii Games of 2008

3 Jan

5)Wii Fit

Because everyone hates it when they know how and why their exercise routines actually benefit them, Wii Fit bypasses going in-depth to elaborate upon things as trivial as your health. Instead, it focuses on improving your balance, something you’ll need after purchasing the game leaves your fat wallet empty.

4) Wii Music

Because everyone loves improvising on “Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go” with incredibly generalized motions for pseudo-instruments like black belts and cheerleaders, Wii Music allows you to play along with your favorite public domain songs without any prior musical knowledge. That’s because Wii Music doesn’t bother actually teaching you anything about music, and instead focuses on wacky waving motions that are fun for minutes on end.

3) Animal Crossing: City Folk

Because everyone loved Animal Crossing: Wild World so much, Animal Crossing: City Folk lets you relive the same exact experience all over again. If you thought real-life chores were fun, you haven’t seen anything yet! Once you’ve accumulated a large fortune from hours of beach combing for sea shells, you can decorate your house will all sorts of fancy furniture that you can sit on or look at.

2) Super Smash Bros. Brawl

Because Fox has always been a fan favorite in the Super Smash Bros. series, Super Smash Bros. Brawl features both Falco and Wolf, both modeled after Fox, all characters who almost exclusively act within their space vehicles. Also new to the series is an incredible online that allows you to play against other players across the world. A neat feature unique to Brawl‘s online multiplayer is an incredibly significant slow down in gameplay that lets you know just how far away your opponents are.

1) EarthBound (VC)

Because Nintendo absolutely loves giving their longtime fans exactly what they want, EarthBound was released for the Virtual Console after topping Nintendo Power’s most wanted list so many months in a row that they had to change up their format so other games could get a chance. Several updates were added for the VC release including translated versions of both MOTHER and MOTHER 3 along with a million dollars being transferred into the bank accounts of anyone who downloads the game. The game has only been available on the VC for a few days now but it’s already the most downloaded title for the service, melting servers and faces and ice cubes and, and, and…

Wait! This isn’t right…

5) Mario Kart Wii

What’s this? Motion controls that are both appropriate and fun? And what the heck!? An online multiplayer mode that actually works! What was Nintendo thinking getting one of their own games right for once? Enjoy this final glimpse of what the Wii is actually supposed to be like while it lasts. I’m sure we’ll be seeing mothers fighting to the death at Wal-Mart next Christmas over their limited supply of Wii Sleep.

4) Super Mario RPG: Legend of the Seven Stars (VC)

What’s this? Re-releasing a game that fans have actually been requesting for years? A game that displays how both Nintendo and Square once knew how to make great video games, together no less? And all for eight bucks! Fanboys will make irrate posts on GameFAQs claiming betrayal and shell out 250 bucks to buy the Ultima Nova Crystalis Fantasmo Holy Savior Edition of Final Fantasy XIII. The rest of us will just giggle to ourselves at Bowser’s excuses outside of Booster Tower.

3) Mega Man 9 (WW)

What’s this? Releasing a sequel that actually focuses on what made the originals great in the first place rather than cheap gimmicks and ridiculous, Japanese cliches? What!? Downloadable content and superior graphics and control on the Wii?? Why is it that a game we could have been playing for twenty years is what makes us power on the Wii after a month or two of neglect? Mario is in space and Link is a wolf, but Mega Man is still Mega Man. Has Mario gotten a star for jumping over a shark yet?

2) No More Heroes

What’s this? Stylized, over-the-top violence and clever,  sexually explicit dialog on the Wii? Incredible and ironic motion controls that can actually resemble the actions you’re executing on the screen? And a Japanese developer actually receiving an overwhelmingly positive reception everyone outside of Japan? Suda51 seems to have the right idea considering that Western game press covers a much larger market that seems to be critically dominated this year by (gasp!) Western games.

1) World of Goo (WW)

What’s this? Incredible visuals on the Wii? An original and refreshing plot? An incredible soundtrack? Rewarding gameplay? A genuinely unique gaming experience for only fifteen dollars? When a team of two outdoes those with a staff in the hundreds, something is wrong. The idea factory was hit by a money bomb a long time ago and developers have been picking up broken pieces stuffed with cash and calling them games ever since.


4 Responses to “Top 5 Wii Games of 2008”

  1. Wicked Celtics January 4, 2009 at 4:09 PM #

    Nice list. The Wii Fit is justly at the top of the heap. Althought you’re right about the big hit to the wallet, it’s worth it once you start losing lbs instead of just a bunch of time.

    This is a video I just posted yesterday about my own Wii Fit obsession. Thought you might like.

  2. chasmang January 4, 2009 at 4:44 PM #

    I hope you’re trying to be sarcastic like I was… 😛

  3. Radiation January 9, 2009 at 4:35 AM #

    I’m not going to hate on you for not liking Brawl, I know a bunch of people don’t like it, but I love how although everyone was drooling over the depth of the game when it was on the DOJO as soon as it comes out everyone ignores the unique aspects of every character and keeps playing like noobs.

    Wolf, Fox, and Falco are completely different characters, I could elaborate a lot but I won’t, if you think they’re all clones just because their B-moves are similar (the final smash nonsense was laziness) then you’re wrong, Wolf’s aerials and ground game is greatly superior to the other two’s with his awesome range and speed, his down+b has invincibility frames and range which actually makes it a lot different (read: better) than the other two’s, Fox’s smashes are great but other than that he’s completely average with sub-par B moves, and Falco is the most camping-oriented character in the game with a ridiculous chaingrab that can end with a 22% damage gatling combo.

    And more.

    Brawl’s one player mode is one of the worst I’ve seen in a long time, no contest. The SSE was horrible and the collect-a-thon that is the rest of the game has lost its charm.

    But Brawl has an incredible amount of depth to it, so if you give its multiplayer mode a fair chance and play with some friends that actually know what they’re doing, it’s very, VERY fun and doesn’t get old because you’re always exercising your mind, looking for the next opening, predicting your opponent, utilizing your character to the fullest.

    Also if you’ve played the WiFi since launch month (which I’m assuming you haven’t), the lag has cooled down SIGNIFICANTLY and while it still sucks (there’s a tenth of a second forced lag) the game runs completely smoothly. The WiFI sucks yes but it’s not as bad as you’re making it out to be unless you’re running a 56K or playing people in Tibet. I play people from Texas with virtually no lag, anyway.

    I guess if you’re a casual gamer that lives by yourself, Brawl is a horrible game. I won’t dispute that. But if you have friends and a willingness to learn and develop as a player, Brawl is amazing.

    (ps – melee’s deeper yeah but Brawl is still p. deep, if you think the game’s been ruined still I don’t know what to say except that’s not true at all, it’s just different)

    • chasmang January 9, 2009 at 5:00 AM #

      I’ve heard this rebuttal to the complaints about Falco and Wolf before, but everyone who makes it is missing the point.

      I don’t care that Fox, Falco, and Wold have significant differences. They’re still modeled after the original Fox and it shows an incredible lack of imagination to throw in Wolf after Melee when Nintendo has so many more characters that could bring more flavor as well as unique mechanics.

      My main complaint about Brawl is that it’s online, even when I picked up a solid router (which handles online perfectly well on other platforms and even some Wii games, gasp!), the online was still like playing some kind of turn-based RPG. I shouldn’t have to rely solely upon friend matches (especially when they require friend codes) to enjoy a game online. Why is it that I can play Call of Duty with no trouble at all, but when it comes to Brawl, I have an entire second of constant delay for entire matches? I’m not exaggerating this at all. It’s ridiculous.

      All I wanted out of Brawl was a Smash Bros. game that I could finally play with other people more than once a month. Nintendo’s online is pretty terrible, but I’m sure Brawl could have got past it with more time in development. Mario Kart did it well. Brawl painted itself into a corner with the incredible amount of hype it layed for itself.

      Brawl is pretty fun, but none of the things I really wanted from it (aside from Lucas) really delivered.

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